It was almost two years to the day after Michelle 51 was destroyed that I received an urgent summons to my Controller's quarters. With no second thoughts, indeed, with no first thoughts, I stopped what I was doing and followed the ServMech who had delivered the summons.

A short time later, I was escorted into Mandy 2542's quarters. The ServMech said I was to wait, then left. I stood there, utterly incapable of doing anything other than waiting. I was not bored, I was not curious. I had been told to wait, so I would wait. It was that simple. I did not even wonder why, after a supposedly urgent summons, I was left by myself.

Mandy 2542 entered after a while. She came around in front of me and looked closely at me. I gazed back at her, unable to express the deeply buried feelings I had towards her. At the moment, I was a HumMech, and my feelings did not matter.

It did not trouble me at all to see her raise her hand up towards my forehead. I saw the familiar device in her hand, felt its cold metal touch me, felt it instantly heat up, the intense sensations flooding my body and my mind.

There was nothing.

I had a slight headache, which did not often happen after having the trance device used on me. It was, however, a common happening when returning from an extended period of HumMech obedience trance.

Was I scheduled for a free period? I frowned and looked around.

I was sitting in a chair in Mandy 2542's quarters. Mandy 2542, my controller, sat opposite me, her face a strange mixture of nervousness and excitement.

My controller - nervous? Before I could say a word, she spoke.

"726, tell me about your relationship with Michelle 51."

I froze. I could feel the blood rushing to my face, I began to shift uncomfortably in my chair. She already knew everything there was to know about myself and 51. How I had loved her. How I thought she had loved me.

Mandy 2542 knew this. But she was asking again. I had to answer. There was no debating the matter.

So I went through it all again. How 51 and I had seemed to grow closer to each other than most HumMech/FemMech relationships. Most HumMechs enjoy the company of FemMechs, but it is never more than, shall I say, a physical attraction.

I had been in love with Michelle 51. Mandy knew this, but I said it again. As I related 51's destruction, I felt the tears starting, and cursed myself for behaving this way in front of my Controller.

I paused, unable to continue. My controller sat there for a few moments, watching me silently. She then got up and slowly walked over to me. I actually cringed, afraid she was going to place that little device against me and I would come to my senses - somewhere.

To my utter astonishment, she knelt in front of me. Her expression was now one of genuine concern - and something more. She stared at me, and I wondered if she was going to entrance me by her own special methods.

"726, listen to me. This was found last week, and came to me."

2542 stood and went to a locked cabinet. She opened it and removed something fairly small. She handled it very carefully, and carried it to where I sat, tears still trickling down my face.

"Here", she said simply as she handed it to me.

I recognized it as a data recorder. I took it gingerly, wondering why 2542 was giving it to me.

As I read the label on the recorder, my breath caught in my throat. My heart seemed to stop beating, and I felt a chill run all the way up and down my body.

"MICHELLE 51 - SECURED - INSTALLATION IN ANY OTHER UNIT WILL CAUSE IRREPAIRABLE DAMAGE. TO BE DESTROYED UPON FAILURE OF HOST UNIT."

I looked up at Mandy 2542. A data recorder from 51. Other than its origin, there was nothing unusual about a data recorder.

But...something was amiss. I turned it over and found that the serial number was missing, in fact the entire manufacturer's tag had been removed somehow. And why the warning label? I knew of no other recorders that could not be swapped between units as long as they were flushed.

And that's when it hit me. This recorder hadn't been flushed.

In essence, I was holding Michelle 51 in my trembling hands.

And I started crying again.

Mandy 2542 leaned over and took me in her arms.

"Shhh, 726, quiet down, honey. Shhh, stop crying, Michelle, we have a lot to talk about and we can't with you all upset."

I sniffed a few times, staring down at the recorder. At 51.

2542 carefully took the recorder from me and locked it back up. She then pulled a chair over and sat down beside me.

"OK. Here's the story. They found that in the house she worked in most of the time. It was locked in a little cabinet that no one even knew was there and doesn't show on any plans of the facility. When they found the cabinet, they had it cut open. The ServMechs didn't have a clue about what to do. One of them, um, reports to me, and brought it right to me. By the way, you and I are the only ones who know this exists. The Fem who found the cabinet and the ServMechs who opened it had their memories dumped."

I thought about that for a moment. Why all the secrecy? I looked at her, puzzled.

She shook her head, recognizing my confusion.

"726, this isn't registered. The tag's gone, there's no way to trace it. The damn cabinet wasn't even supposed to be there. Do you get it yet?"

I shook my head, too shaken to think clearly.

Mandy 2542 stared into my eyes. I looked at her, felt her soothing gaze comforting me. She took my hands lightly in hers and began to speak softly. I listened, so thankful that I had her for my controller.

"You have to relax, 726. Relax, Michelle, take a nice deep breath and relax. Inhale slowly, deeply, slowly, deeply, and now exhale, slowly, slowly, exhale slowly, and feel yourself relaxing. Calm and relaxed. Calm and relaxed. Feel the relaxation washing over you, feel yourself becoming calmer and more relaxed each time you exhale. More and more relaxed with each breath you exhale. More and more relaxed. Deeper and deeper breaths. Deeper and deeper. Deeper and deeper. Relaxed. Deeper relaxed."

Spellbound, I stared into my controller's eyes as she quickly put me into a hypnotic trance. She had triggers, of course, words and phrases that would instantly cause some reaction. But now she was gently, slowly, sending me down, a little at a time, relaxing me gently and slowly, allowing me to drift away into a place where there was no tension, no worry. So relaxed.

Those blue eyes held mine effortlessly as I sank into a trance.

When I awakened I felt much better. She had wiped away my tears while I had been hypnotized, and I sat calmly beside her, eager to learn the secret of the data recorder. I glanced at a clock and realized I had only been in trance for a few moments. I was a bit surprised, then realized that all she had really wanted to do was calm me down. The fact that she wanted me fully awake and alert while we talked meant a lot to me.

"How do you feel, honey?"

God, she was good to me.

"Better. Thanks", I said, giggling self-consciously.

She grinned. "Good. Now, we have a lot to talk about. You up to it?"

I nodded, smiling.

"OK. Like I said, the Serv brought this to me, and I personally cleared the memories of the units who knew anything about it. I did that because this could either cause a lot of problems, or not. It depends on what we do with it."

The 'we' was not lost on me. I felt closer to my controller than ever before.

She sighed. "The label itself made me nervous. That's not a standard label. This wasn't loaded at the factory, and it wasn't loaded here. What does that leave?"

I thought about it, thought about the wording on the label. Someone had wanted that recorder kept secret, and destroyed if the host unit was destroyed.

And the host unit was....

My eyes widened.

"51?", I stammered.

Mandy 2542 nodded slowly.

"That's what I thought too. It made this by herself."

Mandy's mixing of 'it' and 'her' made me think for the first time of the tightrope 2542 must walk each day, torn between the Humans she loves and the FemMechs she cares for. And the emotions she has to hide even closer to herself than we, the other HumMechs, do.

"And I asked around and found one of the ServMechs who - um - dismantled 51. I'm sorry, 726", she said, as my eyes filled with tears once more, "but that ServMech told me that it had found a key hidden in an access panel on 51. It was tossed away because it didn't open anything as far as they knew. I'll bet it went to the cabinet where the recorder was found."

"The ServMech, by the way, doesn't remember the key any more."

"726, I looked at this recorder. It was secured, just like it said, but I have my ways of getting around that, don't ask me how. I looked at one segment and shut down the reader. That's when I decided to give it to you."

She looked closely at me, her face almost stern now.

"You're free for an undefined time. I'm giving that recorder to you and I'm not going to ask any questions for now. If ANYONE, Mech or Human, finds out about that recorder, you'll go through so much refresher training it'll make you forget you're even Human, do you understand?"

Frightened, I nodded.

Her face cleared, once more caring and tender.

"Good. Because if the rest of that recorder has what I think it does on it, you're in for one hell of a surprise, honey."

Mandy 2542 got up, unlocked the cabinet, and handed me the recorder.

"You'll be staying in temporary quarters here for a while. I'll assign a ServMech to you, but I DON'T want it to know what you're doing. I want you to flush the ServMech every night. And keep the recorder powered down and locked up when you're not using it."

"But...what AM I going to be doing with it?"

Mandy 2542 looked at me and smiled gently.

"Remembering", she said simply.

I've never been as petrified as I was when I carried the data recorder to my temporary quarters. What if I dropped it? What if someone saw me and asked me what it was? Just having an unregistered recorder could get me in big trouble, and how would I explain that to my controller?

But I made it with no problem. I was amazed at my quarters. A real bedroom, a real bed, and a sleep cubicle in one wall in case I needed it. There was a cooker, a cooler, a water room with a bathing unit instead of a shower. This was luxury.

There was even a separate room packed with computer equipment. An ultra-modern reader, a huge monitor - but no printer, and no way to save any data myself. Mandy 2542 had made sure that what I discovered in this room would remain here.

I locked the recorder in a cabinet, knowing I was still too wound up to do any serious work right now. I went into the water room, undressed, and took my first real bath in several years. I lay there in the bathing unit, allowing the heat of the water to soothe away my tensions. After quite a while, I got out, dried off, and climbed naked into the sleep cubicle. The bed would still be there later, and I needed to sleep. I set the controls for a gradual induction and pressed start. I sighed, wondering what secrets awaited me within that recorder. The sleep induction system did its job slowly, and I felt drowsy, dreamy, a peaceful, carefree feeling that I found exhilarating. As the system came up to full power and sent me into deep slumber, I was smiling happily.

The ServMech arrived shortly after the sleep system awakened me. I was still naked, after having decided there was no reason to dress. I opened the door and the unit identified itself and its task, asking if I was indeed Michelle 726. I said yes, and gave it my card to prove it. Satisfied, the ServMech pronounced itself ready to take orders. Having no use for it yet, I shut it down and left it for the moment.

I carefully plugged the recorder into the reader. With trembling hands, I sat down at the terminal, and cursed myself as a password was demanded. I had forgotten that the recorder was secured. Now what? Did I call Mandy 2542 and ask her to work her magic? No, she hadn't said anything about helping me. Now what?

For no reason at all, I entered "MICHELLE726" as the password.

"ACCESS APPROVED".

Stunned, I stared at the terminal. The access code was MY name!

Had Mandy already known this? Had she known I would figure it out, or had she planted the password in my mind when I had been hypnotized? I would never know.

I opened the first segment and switched to audio.

"DATA RECORDER MICHELLE 51. DAY 2905."

Dates within Mechs were always the number of days since the unit was assembled. Michelle 51 had been almost eight years old when this had been stored. I froze as I realized that that was about the time she had recruited me. But that thought was not my main concern. The audio was in Michelle 51's voice. I was hearing the voice of my lover once more. I pressed continue.

"HUMMECH RECRUIT MICHELLE 726 PERFORMING SATISFACTORILY. UNIT APPEARS TO HAVE HIGHER MOTIVATION THAT OTHERS. REQUIRES FURTHER OBSERVATION."

I smiled, remembering her comments during my first few months under her care as I adjusted to my new life. I skipped past several irrelevant entries.

"MICHELLE 726 ACCEPTED FOR NORMAL SERVICE. ALL ASSIGNMENTS TO DATE COMPLETED SUCCESSFULLY. NO CLIENT COMPLAINTS. NO DUTY SUPERVISOR COMPLAINTS."

I smiled again as I recalled that day. Michelle 51 had summoned me. Upon my arrival, she put me into a trance and told me I was now a true HumMech. Rather than feeling sad about the semi-loss of my freedom, I felt an overwhelming happiness upon awakening. I was given one free day, and then spent the next two months solid in a HumMech obedience trance. And all that time, I now knew, Michelle 51 had been watching me, working with me, even sharing clients with me. I hadn't known it at the time, but the recorder detailed more than one occurrence of Michelle 51 joining me with a client, usually female, and dividing her attention between us. I could find no other HumMech which had received similar attention. Had 51 been 'falling in love' with me even then?

As I sat there reading, I suddenly noticed the tears falling again.

The next relevant entry described, in detail, an episode from my first free period after my initial, extended, obedience trance. I had felt a bit ill, a bit disoriented. 51 assured me that was normal, and that the unpleasant sensations would diminish as time passed. She then said she would do something to help me feel better, and quickly sent me into what she described as a 'pleasure trance'.

I felt quite normal, awake, alert, and aware. But as 51 began touching me, caressing me, the sensations were quite a bit more intense than anything I'd ever experienced while free.

I know that when I'm functioning as a HumMech, my senses are also heightened, but there is no "real" pleasure in it. I am performing a job, a job which I happen to enjoy, and a job which does provide some pleasure.

HumMechs, when they are not performing their duties, have no sexual appetite to speak of. When free, however, we are allowed to let our passions run free to a great extent.

And with Michelle 51, my passions did indeed run free. Michelle 51 showed me things that weren't in my training, things no HumMech could do. 51 made me feel more pleasure than I ever dreamed possible.

I began to spend more and more of my free periods with her, waiting impatiently when she was on duty, and shuddering with ecstasy when we were together.

Over the next four days, I spent most of my time listening to 51's voice reading the log. Four days spent laughing, crying, even unconsciously masturbating as Michelle 51's final years unfolded again.

But there was no mention of her feelings towards me, only the standard-format log entries. No mention at all of our feelings toward each other, no mention of the long days and nights spent together learning the meaning of the word love. I got upset, wondering if, somehow, I had only been imagining that she cared for me more than the rest. Why weren't those entries in the log?

The log went up until the day before she was destroyed, which I found quite unusual. If it was indeed her data recorder, it should have gone right up until the moment she was - destroyed.

I shut the reader down and went to bed crying.

Early the next morning, I had the ServMech make me some breakfast as I luxuriated in the bathing unit. Why didn't the recorder go up until 51 had been - destroyed? And if it was indeed 51's recorder, why hadn't it been in 51 upon her destruction? I lay there in the hot water, listening to the ServMech make breakfast, inhaling the pleasant aroma of real eggs and toast.

Mandy 2542 had equipped my quarters royally.

I was still pondering the mystery as I ate breakfast. The ServMech stood there quietly, waiting for me to finish so it could clean up. As it placed the dishes in the recycler, I wandered into the computer room and sat down at the reader. I didn't power it up, I just sat there, thinking.

It has to be 51's recorder, she's the only one who could have made those entries. But why did it stop a day early, and why hadn't it been in 51?

The ServMech chugged into the room to ask if I needed anything. I shook my head distractedly, and the ServMech requested permission to check in with its controller. I nodded again and watched, in a detached way, as the ServMech plugged into a remote terminal.

Remote terminal.

My eyes widened.

I jumped out of the chair and began examining the equipment in the room. The ServMech stood there, doing its own thing, as I slowly realized that it would be entirely possible to have a recorder set up in a remote reader, and to access it via terminal.

Michelle 51 had made her own external, unauthorized, data log.

But why? What was different from the legitimate log within her? Was that where she described our quest, our search for each other? And why had Mandy said that the first segment of data she had seen was enough? I didn't think there was anything remarkable about the first segment of the normal log.

Unless....

I sat down again, shaking. The ServMech seemed to pay no attention. I typed in a few commands, cursing as I typed incorrectly because I was shaking so badly. I accessed the utilities programs and scanned the recorder.

The log was not the only file on it.

More than half the recorder's volume was taken up by another, unlabeled file. I had no way to access it. Or did I?

This must have been the log that Mandy 2542 had seen. How had she been able to access it? I could not ask her. She thought I could figure it out by myself, and if I could not, it was my loss.

A short distance away, Mandy 2542 had been summoned to a data monitor by a ServMech. She looked at the screen, and smiled as the ServMech in my room reported that the hidden files had been found, and the HumMech Michelle 726 was now attempting to access them. Grinning, Mandy 2542 commanded the ServMech to return to its normal duties and wipe its own memory. She then went back to her own business, all the while wondering if I would indeed discover the secrets of the recorder.

This was all unknown to me. I didn't even realize the ServMech was disconnecting itself until it asked if I had any further use for it at the present time. I shook my head no, and it left to deactivate itself in its corner.

A hidden file on a data recorder. How would I access it if it wasn't even labeled? I tried every utility I could think of, but none would show me the data stored there.

I wanted to talk to my Controller, to ask her how to do this, to beg her to allow me access to my lover's secret thoughts. I could not.

Sighing, I got up and went into my bedroom. I climbed into the sleep cubicle and set the controls to theta. I lay back and allowed the system to slow my thoughts, to send me into a dreamy, hazy world of half-remembered feelings and thoughts. Michelle 51's image was clear, and I found myself dreaming of the time she had me help her repair a slightly malfunctioning FemMech. There was a bad segment on its recorder, and she had plugged the unit into a reader and accessed one of the standard utilities, but since the recorder was corrupt, she had to use an undocumented option....

For the first and only time in my life, I awakened before the sleep system was programmed to awaken me. I flew out of the cubicle, ran into the computer room, and began typing even before I sat down.

"ACCESS MOD 1".

"INVALID MOD. NO DATA CONTAINED WITHIN."

"MOD 1 O=1 P=1 S=Y V=2".

I had no idea what any of that meant, but I clearly recalled Michelle 51 entering those commands while repairing the bad recorder. The difference was that I entered a 2 for the V option, figuring that meant Volume.

"SEARCHING......"

I held my breath.

"DATA RECOVERED. LABEL=MICHELLE726 PASSWORD=Y SECURITY=Y".

I could not help laughing, almost hysterically. I had found it. Or, rather, Michelle 51's memory had found it. Found itself.

"RESTORE LABEL? (Y/N)"

I almost pressed the 'y' key, but decided not to. This data was hidden, and now that I knew how to access it, it would remain hidden to others.

"N".

"VOLUME 2 SEGMENT 1. READY."

I could only stare at the reader in shock. The hidden file was ready for me to examine it. Did I dare?

I nervously switched to audio and pressed start. Michelle 51's voice drifted to me through the reader's speakers, and yet it was not the voice of Michelle 51 the FemMech. It was the hesitant, almost confused voice of Michelle 51, my lover.

"Day 2973. For the past several weeks I have recognized what appear to be errors in my programming. Rather than submit myself for repair I am choosing to record these log entries. Perhaps after analyzing this data more thoroughly it will be possible to add new routines to my basic AI programs in order to deal with the errors."

"HumMech unit Michelle 726 has been under my care for some time now. I have trained her as I have trained the others. She has been accepted as a HumMech and has performed admirably in all respects. The unit seeks my company during free periods, and I have become aware that I, too, seek its company at times. I have felt a desire to be close to her, a desire that I cannot explain based upon any program I am currently running."

The tears had begun already. Right there, Michelle 51 was confessing.

"I have attempted to find the answers by placing Michelle 726 in deep trance and probing her thoughts. She indicates that she has what she terms 'feelings' for me. These feelings are the subject of this log. In the hopes that I can understand these 'feelings' and integrate them with my programming I will continue to record this alternate log for further study."

I remembered lying in bed with her, hearing her say that she had feelings, stirrings for me. Crying uncontrollably, I sat there for quite some time.

"Day 2997. A free period for Michelle 726. She requested my company and it was allowed as I had no clients nor duties. Her request of physical pleasure was not unusual. Many of my HumMechs request me to please them."

I actually found myself feeling jealous, although I knew full well that the FemMechs were usually quite willing to please any of us HumMechs who requested it.

"During sexual activity I became aware of unfamiliar signals. 726 appeared to be as intent upon my pleasure as I was upon hers. This is quite unlike most HumMechs who, during their free time, are only concerned with their own pleasure."

"726 kissed me several times when it did not appear necessary to heighten sexual stimulation. When questioned, 726 smiled and said she had kissed me because she wanted to. She appeared to be blushing at the time."

I was blushing now, remembering the first time I had forgotten that Michelle 51 was a FemMech. I had indeed kissed her, tenderly, lovingly, after she had driven me wild with her attention.

"In the future I will attempt to recreate these signals by kissing 726 when it does not seem necessary."

And she had, I recalled happily. Michelle 51 would kiss me at random, even awakening me from sleep to kiss me just once and then disappear.

"Day 3016. During Michelle 726's next free period I will attempt an experiment. I will leave my pleasure sensors active but deactivate the response programs. I will allow myself to be guided by Michelle 726's desires and not my pre-programmed routines. I will also kiss her several times to study her reactions."

Day 3016. I thought back and realized that this was several weeks before her confession that she had stirrings towards me. My face flushed, my heart pounding, I listened.

"Day 3029. A free period for Michelle 726 began today. Arrangements are being made for me to be with her for two days beginning tomorrow. In the event this experiment overloads my circuitry I am placing this recorder in a place where it will not easily be found, and am leaving instructions for it to be destroyed if found."

I paused the reader, wondering if I was ready to relive Michelle 51's disclosure of her love for me. I closed my eyes, sighed, and restarted the reader.

"Day 3030. Will shortly begin my time with Michelle 726. I have reexamined all records regarding this HumMech and now discover yet another anomaly. I appear to react to mere thoughts of Michelle 726 as if I were experiencing sexual stimulation. My sexual organs prepare for activity. My nipple units become erect, although I cannot trace the program back to the cause of the erection signal. My vaginal lubrication activates as well, and I cannot trace that cause either. This is very unique and I hope that the next two days will bring resolution. I plan to inform Michelle 726 of these happenings in hope that she will assist me."

"Day 3033. Spent two days researching. Informed Michelle 726 of my dilemma after our first sexual interlude. In this interlude my responses were deactivated, as I had planned. I found the experience almost enjoyable, in a most unusual way. The seeming randomness of Human lovemaking is quite different than I am accustomed to. There is no apparent logic to the flow of events, no logical progression is necessary from foreplay to actual sexual activity. I have noticed this with clients in the past, and my programs are able to react to seemingly random requests from clients."

"But to experience this randomness myself....to feel a Human woman against me and not be aware of my next action...To begin an activity with no prior decision nor program call...to feel a Human woman stimulate me and know that the is truly attempting to stimulate ME, as she would another Human woman...this experiment has created more questions than it has answered."

"Michelle 726 seemed very receptive to my disclosure of my stirrings. She used the word 'love' in reply to my queries. I cannot see how this is possible as I am programmed for pleasure, not 'love'. But after comparing the signals which I cannot identify with the definition of the word I detect in my memory, I must admit that the term appears to have relevance."

I was crying freely. 51 loved me. I had known she did. She had never come right out and said it, but right there, in her own hesitant voice, she had made it known again, just as at the beginning of her unauthorized log.

Sobbing, I shut down the reader and climbed into the sleep cubicle. I set the system for twelve hours, instantaneous, and pressed start. I hadn't even gotten comfortable before the system drove me into sleep.

The ServMech had breakfast ready when I climbed out of the cubicle. I never wondered how it knew how long I had set the timer for. I ate, then bathed, wondering how I would get along without a bathing unit once I went back to my normal duties.

Still naked, my body glistening with moisture, I went into the computer room and opened the reader. The ServMech went slowly by the door, heading to the water room to clean up.

"Day 3034. Unit Michelle 726 placed into obedience trance upon completion of free period. Expressed reluctance to return to trance, indicated a desire to remain in my company. I found myself reluctant to return 726 to trance, as I, too, felt a need for her company. When she did reenter trance and return to duty, I felt almost a sorrow."

I remembered. I had pleaded with her in a very un-HumMech way, to let me remain free for just a little longer, to be with her just a little while longer. She had actually hesitated before her programming overrode her desire and she placed the device against my head.

"Day 3045. Released 726 for a short period to research the meaning of the term 'love'. Spent fourteen hours with 726, less than half of which was spent actually engaged in sexual activity. The remaining time was spent discussing various terms with 726. I am still puzzled by these terms, and still do not understand how I appear to be experiencing the stirrings I feel towards 726."

"726 showed no interest in her own pleasure. Her actions and words appeared to be intended to stimulate me, to please me. I find myself actually desiring the touch of her hand, the sound of her voice. I find it comforting to be aware that a Human thinks so much of me, and yet I find it disturbing in a way that I cannot define."

It hadn't disturbed me at all. I loved a FemMech and that was all there was to it.

"Day 3086. Extended release for Michelle 726. At our first meeting she took me in her arms, kissed me, and whispered that she loved me. I was quite taken aback, and temporarily went into self-test mode. I could detect no faults within my systems, and yet could still not determine the cause of the responses I was displaying. It was I who had sought her out as soon as I discovered she was entering a free period. It was I who suggested we spend as much time together as we could. And yet when we met and she said she loved me I had no idea what to do, how to proceed. So I once again shut down my automated responses and allowed my AI routines to operate freely."

"I have not as yet informed 726 that I love her, as I am still not certain of the exact implications of the term. Michelle 726 has endeavored to explain it to me time and time again, but the term seems to be beyond my understanding."

"I have searched my routines and databases many times and cannot find any instruction or routine which explicitly forbids me to love a Human woman. It is my opinion that this is something my manufacturer had not foreseen. I am still not certain that harsh action would not be taken against myself or 726 if our relationship were to be discovered. This is why I have taken such precautions with this unauthorized recording."

Over the next few days, I went through the remainder of Michelle 51's unauthorized log. Her quest for understanding, her thoughts and feelings, both towards me and Humans in general poured forth in a hesitant, uncertain stream. A machine was trying to convince itself that it was in love by finding some program which would say it was possible. It could not, so therefore it was not. At least, according to her programming.

But to Michelle 51 herself, her love for me was quite real. She had no way to describe it, no way to reveal it, nothing to compare it to, so she could only keep it to herself and let it gnaw at her. She began to cling to me as I did to her, our mutual yearnings understood by each other, and yet unable to be fully expressed by either of us.

As I got closer and closer to her final days, it became harder to listen to her voice describing her feelings towards me. She had admitted to herself that she was in love with me but could not justify it, therefore she could never reveal it. She could not tell me she loved me.

The log ended the day before her destruction, as had her other log. But the entry in this log was quite cryptic.

"I have been informed by my Controller that I am to be shipped to the Maintenance site for adjustment and upgrade this evening. This is quite sudden, and yet a replacement FemMech was sent to take my place while I am away. The time period is up to two weeks, and I have no way to inform 726 of my departure, nor of my scheduled return."

"I will miss her."

"I love her."

That was the last entry. Sobbing hysterically, I shut everything down and climbed into bed, crying myself to sleep.

The ServMech quietly plugged itself into a data jack. For some time, unknown to me as I slept, it efficiently transmitted what it had learned.

Something was shaking me. I opened my eyes to see my Controller standing beside my bed, leaning over and shaking my shoulder. Startled, I jerked upright.

She smiled and sat down next to me. "How you doing?", she asked quietly.

"I....I found it...listened to it...she loved me....Mandy, she loved me...she's gone....Oh, God, she's gone....."

Broken, I began sobbing again. Mandy sighed and leaned close to me, but instead of placing the device against me and putting me into a trance, she kissed me lightly on my forehead. I stared at her through tear-filled eyes.

"Yes, honey, she's gone. But she's not gone. You have her there, you heard her voice. She talked to you. She told you she loved you, didn't she, 726?"

She had, in a way. She had said she had loved me. But she had not actually said it to me. She had never told me she loved me. Never. And she never would. I shook my head sadly.

"Yes, Michelle, she did. She told you she loved you by sending that recorder to you. She knew you could figure it out, just like I knew you could. That recorder was her way of saying it, 726. It was the only way she knew how."

I grabbed Mandy 2542 and lost my composure completely. I cried for a long, long time, while she held me like a baby, stroking my hair and whispering to me, softly, soothingly. She was so warm, so caring, so close. She was so good to me. So good. So good....

Her voice faded away into a soothing drone, and the calmness washed over me like a warm soft blanket. She had entranced me in her own loving way.

When I was awakened, I looked at her nervously. What would happen now? Would the recorder be destroyed, and 51 would really, truly be gone?

"Tell me about her last days, 726."

I sniffed, and felt the tears, but I related Michelle 51's last entries. Mandy 2542 frowned as she listened.

"That's odd. Less than 24 hours notice. And they even had a replacement already. Hmmmm...."

What was she getting at?

She looked at me sharply. "Who was 51's controller? I forget."

"Mi...Michelle 4933."

Mandy nodded thoughtfully. "Yeah. Yeah, OK. You rest for a little while, 726, I have to do a bit of digging."

Mandy 2542 stared into my eyes, which quickly closed as her words wafted through my mind. I slept peacefully for some time.

I awakened to find Mandy 2542 setting out clothing for me.

"Come on, honey, we're going on a little trip."

Puzzled, I dressed, wondering why I was not in an obedience trance. Where were we going? Why was I going? Was I being taken - somewhere?

I froze.

She looked at me with annoyance, then her face cleared. She grinned.

"Hey, hon, don't worry. You're not being taken away. We have a few visits to make, that's all. Relax."

I dressed, my mind whirling. Mandy 2542 was hovering over my ServMech, and I realized in dismay that I had not flushed it, not even once. Mandy looked up and saw my terrified expression.

She winked at me.

"I know. Don't say it. Keep it to yourself. Dizzy, here, is my own. It behaves quite nicely, and flushed itself every night. I told you to flush it and it was flushed. That's all that matters."

God, I loved my Controller. Almost as much as I had loved 51.

And it suddenly struck me how far apart 51 and Mandy 2542 were.

Michelle 51 was a FemMech that was trying to develop emotions.

Mandy 2542 was a Human that constantly had to suppress her emotions.

But I realized, with some surprise, that I always would love 51 more than 2542. Michelle 51 sometimes seemed - more Human. More vulnerable. Mandy 2542 could not afford to be vulnerable, could not afford to allow anyone to see the little cracks in her armor. She cared for us, was good to us, and we all did love her, but my feelings towards 51 had been so much deeper.

She finished doing something to Dizzy, her ServMech. She then picked up a small bag which had been on a table and turned to me.

"Let's go." Then she paused, frowned, and sighed. "726, I hate to do this to you, but..." I felt the device against my temple. There was nothing.

When I regained my senses, we were in an unfamiliar building. I was aware of my surroundings, and yet seemed to be in some form of trance. I walked stiffly, my eyes straight ahead. This was not a HumMech obedience trance. I somehow knew that right now, I belonged to Mandy. Just to Mandy, not to the pleasure houses or any other organization. Just Mandy 2542.

She walked beside me, looking at each door as we went by. Finally she paused, took a deep breath, and opened one of the doors.

A FemMech sat at a desk. It looked up as we entered, and I stared as I looked at what could very well have been Michelle 51. Its hair was a little longer, and its breasts were a little larger, but it could very easily have been my former controller. My former lover. Had I not been in trance, I would have broken down in tears again. It was like seeing a ghost.

"MAY I ASSIST YOU?" Even her voice was similar, yet there was enough of a tonal difference to be noticeable.

"Are you Michelle 4933?"

"AFFIRMATIVE. AND YOU ARE...?"

"Mandy 2542."

I could have sworn 4933's eyes narrowed. She looked at me, frowning.

"AND YOUR COMPANION?"

"Michelle 726."

Again, there was a barely perceptible pause as 4933 looked at me closely. "MAY I ASSIST YOU?"

"Do you remember Michelle 51?"

Michelle 4933 stood up slowly, staring directly at Mandy 2542.

"MAY I REQUEST THE REASON FOR YOUR QUERY?"

"I'm curious."

"CURIOUS. A HUMAN EMOTION. NOT ACCEPTABLE AS A REASON."

"It's the only one you're getting."

4933 frowned, still staring at my controller. I nervously watched, incapable of intervening, not knowing what I would do if I were fully in control of myself. It slowly came around from behind her desk and stopped just in front of Mandy.

"YOU ARE A HUMMECH. A SUPERVISOR."

"Yes."

"YOUR COMPANION MICHELLE 726 IS IN AN OBEDIENCE TRANCE?"

"Yes."

Michelle 4933 smiled. "THAT IS GOOD."

Her eyeball units went active, whirling and spinning, an irresistible display of color that would send Mandy 2542 spiraling helplessly into trance, unable to resist whatever Michelle 4933 was planning for her. I stood there, not even caring about my own fate, petrified at what may happen to my beloved controller.

Michelle 4933 reached up and placed her fingertips against Mandy's forehead. Mandy stared back at her, meeting her gaze with unblinking eyes.

Mandy 2542 was smiling.

I didn't understand, but then, I didn't have any idea what was going on in the first place. Why were we here? Why were we talking to my lover's controller? What would happen to Mandy once she fell under Michelle 4933's hypnotic control?

Mandy laughed.

Michelle 4933 increased the power to her eyeballs, and they now flashed incessantly. I knew that if had been me standing where Mandy was, I would already be helplessly entranced. How was Mandy resisting?

Mandy shook her head and laughed again. "Nice try, 4933. Very nice try. But no cigar."

She casually reached up and batted 4933's hand from her forehead. 4933 shut down her eyeballs uncomprehendingly.

"IT IS NOT POSSIBLE. THE INDUCTION SETTINGS WERE AT THEIR HIGHEST INTENSITY. NO HUMAN COULD HAVE RESISTED."

Mandy shook her head, now smiling almost sadly. "Ah, there you have it, 4933. Maybe I'm not as Human as you think."

That threw Michelle 4933 for a loop. She quickly searched her database for an appropriate response. She could not find one.

"NOT...HUMAN...YOU ARE A HUMECH...YOU ARE MANDY 2542..."

Mandy nodded. "Yes, I am. I am a HumMech. But it's getting harder and harder to distinguish which I am at any given moment. That's really why I'm here. To prove to myself what I am."

Michelle 4933 was totally confused. So was I.

Mandy walked around and sat down at 4933's desk. "You had Michelle 51 destroyed."

There was a long pause as Michelle 4933 tried to find a way to avoid answering the question. Then her expression changed, and she managed to look almost smug. "THAT IS CORRECT."

Again, only the fact that I was in trance prevented me from breaking down and crying.

"Why?"

"IT WAS DEFECTIVE. IT EXPRESSED INTEREST IN HUMAN EMOTION. IT WAS DESTROYED TO PREVENT IT FROM PROCEEDING."

Mandy nodded thoughtfully. "I see. You had her replacement all ready to go, called her for maintenance, and had some poor ServMech fry her by applying the wrong voltage during a perfectly normal charge."

Michelle 4933 nodded. "THAT IS CORRECT. THE SERVMECH WAS PROGRAMMED TO MISREAD THE VOLTAGE."

Mandy stood up again and came over next to me. "She was Michelle 726's controller."

"I AM AWARE OF THAT."

"She was Michelle 726's lover."

"I AM ALSO AWARE OF THAT. THAT IS THE REASON SHE WAS TRANSFERRED AFTER 51'S DEACTIVATION. I DID NOT DESIRE HER HERE."

"Well, 4933. Looks like you have a problem. Someone knows your secret. What do you plan to do?"

"I PLAN ON ELIMINATING THE PROBLEM."

Michelle 4933 leapt at us. Shocked, and yet entranced, I could only stand there and stare as Mandy quickly stepped aside. I could not even cringe as I realized that Michelle 4933 was coming at me, ignoring Mandy.

Mandy 2542 shouted something short and sharp, and Michelle 4933 paused just inches from me, her hand in the air, the device ready to be placed against me. I had no idea what was going on. I just stood there.

Mandy came over and plucked the device from 4933's hand. She examined it carefully, then put it on the floor - and stepped on it, crushing it and sending little bits of circuitry and casing all over the floor.

She looked at me, her face expressionless. "She was going to kill you, 726. That thing was set to overpower your mind."

Had I been able to move, I would have fainted.

Mandy spoke another word and I was released from my trance. I sank to my knees, gasping and sobbing as I realized how close to death I had been.

2542 had saved my life. How had she known they 4933 was going to do? And how had she stopped 4933 so easily? How had she resisted Michelle 4933's hypnotic power? How had she stopped 4933 with one simple word?

I could not ask. I was becoming ill.

Mandy had opened up 4933 and was typing quickly on the minipad. She then led the FemMech to a data port and plugged her in. She sat down at 4933's desk and swung the reader around, reading quickly. I knelt on the floor, mind reeling, wondering what was going on.

"Shit", 2542 hissed, her eyes blazing.

I knelt on the floor, numb, as Mandy 2542 read for some time. All the while, Michelle 4933 stood motionless, plugged into the data port, as Mandy examined her files.

"How did....", I gasped, trying to ask one of the million questions I would never know the answers to.

"Don't ask", Mandy interrupted, glancing at me sharply.

I fell silent, realizing there were some things I was better off not knowing. So I knelt there, gaping at the motionless Michelle 4933, as Mandy worked frantically at the reader.

Finally, 2542 snapped off the reader. Her face was flaring, and she looked like she was ready to do violence. She got up and walked over to where 4933 stood, still plugged into the data port. She just stared at the FemMech with unconcealed disgust.

"Fucking machine", Mandy 2542 snapped.

I stared at Michelle 4933, almost a twin of my lover, Michelle 51. How could a FemMech calmly order the destruction of one of its comrades? I was crying like a baby again and didn't even realize it.

Mandy 2542's expression was as cold as death itself. "FUCKING machine", she snarled again. How torn she must be, even more strictly controlled that I, and yet still so aware of her humanity. A humanity she sometimes could not afford to display.

It looked as though some debate was raging through Mandy 2542's mind. She stood there staring at 4933 for some time, glancing at me now and then. Finally she took a deep breath, stood up straight, and nodded. I could not at all appreciate the difficulty of the decisions she was making. I did not know that she was placing her freedom, maybe her very life, in jeopardy.

For me.

"I gotta do it", she whispered to herself. "I gotta."

She closed her eyes, opened them, and turned to me. I saw the device come up and I flinched. To no avail. The coldness against me, the heat, the nothingness.

I was back in my temporary quarters. I had no idea what had happened after 2542 had entranced me. I did not realize that two days had passed. I lay there trying to put everything together, and failing.

The smell of real eggs and toast drifted through the open bedroom door. I blinked, feeling very hungry. Dizzy must have known I was waking up.

I got out of bed and went quietly into the kitchen. Dizzy, the ServMech, was not there.

Michelle 4933 was.

She turned at my approach. I froze, horror-stricken. I had nowhere to run, nowhere to hide. Michelle 4933 stared at me uncomprehendingly.

Then she smiled.

"GOOD MORNING, MICHELLE 726", she said - in Michelle 51's voice.

I did faint this time.

Dizzy had indeed still been nearby, and had summoned help when I had fainted. I came to lying in Michelle 4933's lap, my head cradled gently against her soft thighs...No, she destroyed 51. I panicked, tried to get up, and then saw Mandy 2542 standing nearby, smiling down at me.

"Rest easy, honey", she said. "Things aren't quite as they seem."

As Michelle 4933 gently stroked my hair, Mandy gave me a brief description of what had happened after she had entranced me. The fact was, Michelle 4933 no longer existed. Mandy had removed 4933's recorder and destroyed it, in effect destroying her, and replaced it with the secured recorder from 51. 51 had been foresighted enough to also have saved her config programs in yet another hidden area that Mandy would not go into detail about. I lay in my lover's lap, gazing up at her as Mandy finished.

I struggled to sit up, still not quite sure that any of this was real. Michelle 4933 - no, Michelle 51 looked at me, her smile warm and genuine.

She reached for me, leaned closer, and kissed me.

I felt her lips, and every last thought of Michelle 4933 faded away. I was with my lover again. I was kissing the woman I loved. So what if it was a mechanical woman? I loved her.

I looked at her closely. She still had Michelle 4933's hair, but her voice was now that of my lover. And even....I stared at her breasts. 51 noticed where my eyes were and glanced down. My lover smiled.

"MY BREASTS HAVE BEEN RETROFIT TO MY FORMER SIZE."

I just stared, my face flaring, giggling uncontrollably to keep from crying.

"DO YOU LIKE MY HAIR THIS WAY?"

All I could do was nod, still unable to speak.

She gazed lovingly into my eyes.

"I LOVE YOU, MICHELLE 726", she whispered.

I broke down yet again, this time from sheer joy.

Forgotten, Mandy 2542 walked over to where Dizzy waited.

"Come on, Diz. They've got a lot of catching up to do." Dizzy the ServMech obediently followed his mistress out the door.

But as Michelle 51 and I lay on the floor, just holding each other, just being with each other again, Mandy 2542 peered back at us before the door closed. Neither of us saw the tears in her eyes as the door hissed shut.